Belated Spring

One of my favorite vintage Canto songs

Photo by Daiga Ellaby on Unsplash

My 13-year-old daughter has added headphones as her daily wear at home and outdoors for many months. She listens to her favorite songs whenever she has time…walking, eating, and between tasks.

It didn’t take me long to realize that I was just like her when I was her age. I tried to bond with her by listening to her songs, but I didn’t succeed in getting into her world and making her happy about appreciating her songs the way she does.

So, the other day, I put on my headphones and listened to songs that made me feel understood when I was 13.

My daughter and I were sitting side by side at the front of the upper deck of a bus. With headphones on our heads, the scenic view of mountains and the sea around us, sprinkles of tall residential buildings here and there, we were both happy in our own worlds that were magically linked to the same universe. Our occasional glances at each other procured genuine smiles that were better than words that couldn’t find their way out of our mouths.

(My daughter just told me after reading this that she smiled to make me smile because she thought I was mad at her since I looked so serious. There was nothing magic there. Nevertheless, she was happy with the bonding. I guess I am much more of a romantic person than she is.)

Belated Spring is my all-time favorite. It was one of the songs I was listening to on the bus ride. I remembered, although I didn’t have any of the experiences expressed in the song when I was 13, my then-favorite singer’s voice carried me into the story as if I had lived it.

I was as crazy about Alan Tam as my daughter is about Taylor Swift. I was probably even more. I also knew every single song of his and all the lyrics by heart. Of all his song lyrics, Belated Spring is one of the best.

Belated Spring

(Click the link above to listen to the song. The music was originally written by a Japanese composer.)

Here’s my translation, which does not do justice to the original poetic lyric.

Who has shone a little love into hope?
A dream from the past, subconsciously, I fell in love with it again.
I should not love a belated spring; I resisted it helplessly, but it became more lovely.
So I let it start and make another mistake.

I will never forget laying eyes on you the first time; I now sigh about not meeting at the right time.
Love is a riddle, hard to guess.
Silently enduring my internal emptiness where I hid my heart, I forced myself to let this love fade away.
Contradictions swirl in my heart, and I can’t be free and let go.

Who knows the path I am taking today?
I don’t know when I can arrive, I don’t care to know anymore.
Belated spring, I only wish to stay with you and embrace you forever
Knowing this joy will be in vain, I will be sad again.

What’s ahead seems unclear.

With this added wall surrounding me, even though there is a burning passion, I find it hard to open up.

Flames of passion should not be frozen and hidden under an iceberg.
I find it hard to show you my true heart

Dejected, my contradictory heart.